Klassnaya Popka?

I'm back! I'm sorry that I have taken so long to write a new post. I have heard stories of a few followers that have developed anxiety disorders as a result of this absence, and for that I sincerely apologize. For those who don't know, I am currently in the Motherland. For those of you who are not very intelligent, I am in Moscow, Russia, not the land of mothers. I have been here for almost a week now and will remain here for another three weeks. Some of you faithful who know that I have a Russia only blog may be a little confused by this post. To that, I respond by saying that this blog post is not necessarily spiritual, merely to entertain. Anywho, after a week of being here, I have noticed several things about Russian culture that are worth blogging about. Enjoy.

1) Russians do not wear deodorant - I do not know why, but this is just not a necessity in the life of a Russian. There's nothing more enjoyable than being crammed into a metro car (or cattle car as I would phrase it) with several incredibly sweaty B.O. smelling Russian men. I would question why these Russian men are so sweaty at 10 in the morning, but the fact that I have not stopped sweating since I arrived in Moscow has answered that for me.

2) Russians have an unhealthy obsession with ice cream and McDonalds - This is quite the phenomenon. There is not a restaurant/food vendor in Moscow that does not have ice cream available for purchase. I love this city specifically for that reason. As for McDonalds, I clearly do not understand why the great people of Russia love it so much, but the long lines there all day long ring true for me. Maybe it's because you will not go a day without walking at least five miles in this city and you can afford the extra calories as a result.

3) Speed limits and other traffic signs are optional - I am fairly optimistic that by the  trip I will have gotten hit by a car. A word of advice for any prospective Moscow travellers: while crossing the street, DO NOT look drivers in the eye. Instead, simply look straight ahead and pray fervently. I am 4 for 5 in this regard.

4) The Metro may be the closest thing to anarchy that I will ever experience - It is nuts! People are pushing, shoving, throwing babies out of the way. The only calm place in the metro is the escalator and even that is a hassle to get to. Not to mention trying to read which stop you need to go to, in Russian, on the complex map.

5) Russians like EXCESSIVE PDA - Making out..everywhere..on the metro, park bench, escalator, middle of a crosswalk, Mcdonalds..think of a place and two Russians have probably macked there, or worse...

6) I have ordered two food things that I haven't the slightest clue what they were, but they were extremely delicious.

That's all I have for now. Hopefully I can live to tell the tale of more of my adventures later. Peace out.