Extreme Home Makeover: Testosterhome edition

This past weekend, Todd went to Norman, Oklahoma to reunite with all of his Moscow summer project buddies. While he was away, I decided to completely reorganize our bedroom. The following is the process of Extreme Home Makeover: Testosterhome edition.

Before:

Desk area: cluttered, inefficient, slight tone of hoarding associated with it.

South wall: Messy, cramped, inefficient use of space.

 



East wall: not such a bad place for the beds, or so I thought...










The Process:



1. Removal of the plywood desk.

Step 2: Putting in a desk for Todd. I have decided to eliminate my need for a desk and have opted for piano space instead. 

 



















Step 3: Moving the piano and drawers over to the new desk space.

Step 4: Moving the beds to the  south side of the room.

Step 5: Drum set..Ohhhhhh yeah!

The Big Reveal:

Leading the poor family (Todd) to see his new home!

HE WAS ECSTATIC!!!!!!

It's ok to feel inferior to me. I doubt your Saturday was as NEARLY as productive as mine. My next post will be about Heather Hill because she bribed me with hot tamales. Peace out nation.

The Road to a Rockin Bod

November 1, 2010 brings new goals, new dreams, new ideas, and the start of big beards. I don't know why my brain operates this way, but I am only able to start something new at a definitive beginning such as the beginning of a month, beginning of a week, etc..Well on  October 31, Todd (my roommate for those of you who don't know) and I decided that we will start to start eating healthier and working out consistently in hopes of losing some weight and turning our kegs into 6-packs. Can I get an amen?! Naturally, we began on November 1, and already I am beginning to see why I have failed at this so many times in the past, I didn't have a person to go through with me through this ordeal. Having Todd suffer with me as we pedal away on our stationary bikes and eat green stuff motivates me to continue on our path from lookin' good to lookin' GOOD.

A week into it now and I've already broken through my craving for fast food and successfully curbed my consumption of dr. pepper. It's a long and arduous journey, but by the end of it we will go from looking like this:

To this:

I tend to exaggerate a bit, but you get the point. As we continue on this trek, please offer any prayers and do not tempt us with delicious double cheeseburgers or tantalizing cups of Dr. Pepper, or I may have to punch you in the face. That is all. Sorry it took me so long to put another blog out, but you can't rush perfection right?

Ode to Ross Darden

I am beginning a series on giving shoutouts to my good friends. These people are awesome and I don't know what I would do without them.

First up, Ross Darden, AKA Doss Rarden AKA The Big Cheese (that one's new).

Ross Matthew Darden, born on the glorious day of February 17, 1990 to Pat and Lynn Darden. Ross didn't necessarily have a normal childhood. At age 6 months, he cured cancer, however because he had the attention span of a goldfish, he was not able to share it with the world. By age 3, he mastered Beethoven's Symphony No. 5 on his Fisher-Price toy piano. At age ten, he began writing a series of books under the pen name, J.K. Rowling. Now on to junior high where I first became friends with this young prodigy.

In the 7th grade, I became friends with Ross Darden in Mrs. Durham's Texas History class. Little did we know that our young friendship would blossom into such a beautiful thing it is today. We became tennis doubles partners in the 8th grade where we wrecked shop on a regular basis. He also made Mr. Evitt, our Spanish teacher,  literally despise us with his endless fountain of sarcasm. My fondest memory with Ross was the day after we had both gotten braces put on our teeth and we drank HUGE slurpees in his tv room and we farted a ton and almost made Lynn (his mother) almost pass out when she came in the room. However, that night we had a feast of soft foods, it was glorious.  From there we move on to our high school years.

Early on in high school, our friendship became a distant memory, mostly due to the fact that Ross's addictions with cocaine and crystal meth had gotten the best of him (just kidding?). However, we were reunited once again on the tennis court as well as in Mrs. Johnston's computer class where I witnessed him single-handedly destroy a Midland Christian computer by playing his stupid, yes I said stupid, pyramid solitaire game. They even put that computer in a body bag and everything.  Our senior year, we had the pleasure of taking Mrs. Lalk again, this time in physics. That class brought joy to my life every single day because of Doss Rarden. I will never forget the day Mrs. Lalk actually told Ross to "shut up." After graduation, we've gone our separate ways..(cue opening theme song to Saved By the Bell: The College Years.)

After high school, Ross decided to attend GAYCU, whilst I attended the prestigous Texas Tech University. We were reunited once again the summer after our freshman year, getting the opportunity to work together at David H. Arrington Oil & Gas. We were "interns" which meant we did the most meaningless tasks ever and had "fun" doing it. The videos I have attached show how much "work" we actually did. Alas, school tore us apart once more after that summer, but we got to work together for half of the summer this past year, same company, same shananigans. That is all I have on this glorious man of fortitude. In a mere 3 days, I will be reunited with him once more and together, we will tear up the streets of the 806. Next time: Spencer Gill.

You're the Voice!

As I sit here half naked at 12:30 a.m., I think to myself, "Who is arguably the most famous person in Australia ever?" I begin to research frantically..the answer, John Farnham. This blog has therefore been deemed a tribute to this great musical genius.





John Farnham was born July 1, 1949 in England. His album "Whispering Jack" held the number one spot in the music charts in Australia for twenty-five consecutive weeks and is the highest selling album in Australian history. He is the only Australian artist to have a #1 record in five consecutive decades. In 1987, he was named Australian of the Year (even though he wasn't even a citizen there yet!) for his music contributions for 20+ years.

In addition to being possibly the greatest singer in Australian history, John Farnham is also a family man. He met his wife, Jillian Billman, while performing the stage musical Charlie Girl on April 18, 1973. They have been together ever since and have two sons, Robert and James.

John Farnham's song, "You're the Voice" is quite possibly the most epic song to have graced my ears. I do not understand how you can listen to that song and NOT get amped up. WATCH THE MUSIC VIDEO AT THE BOTTOM. That's all I have for now, John Farnham, if you're reading this, I hope that I have made you proud. In the words of John Farnham, "We're all someone's daughter, we're all someone's son." Stay classy.

John Farnham "You're the Voice" music video

Un Angél no Debe Llorar

              (Esta parte para Maurie) Hola, lo siento que me a tomado mucho tiempo para escribir una entrada. Sin embargo, les aseguro que esta entrada será magnifico. Allie Bratcher está una chica malvada y una enana y tan bobo. Suficiente Español, sorry I've been listening to "Un Angél no Debe Llorar" and I was just overcome with the desire to speak Spanish. Thank you Brenda for helping me think of the words I wanted to type. If you want to know what I said up there, you best bust out a translator because I'm not doing it for you. Alright so since this is a special Wednesday edition of my blog, I have included a video that ya'll will find quite entertaining.
          
             Nation (Yes, I assume that by now the entire country is hanging onto my every word), I am also making your day by including several photos from around the home. Please contain your jealousy because God said so.

Warning: The following pictures are good clean fun. What are you about to see may be so disturbing, you could potentially vomit everywhere at the mere sight of them..viewer discretion is advised.

  

     Who else do you know has a Wall of Inspiration?

     I think our bikes reproduced several times since last year...

 Just try to break (walk since we never lock our doors) into our house I dare ya (notice how Todd's weapon of choice is a screwdriver..to each his own I guess)

      Our kitchen/dining room. Nothing special except for more bikes..

      Our brave stove. (no that isn't blood on the stove, yes that is a bullet hole)

     After all the stories I've told you, are you even surprised that that's really a bullet hole?

     My pantry, the 'rents hooked me up phat

     Mine and Todd's study space

    Mine and Todd's sleeping space, I get the top bunk of course

     ..................................

     I hope you still have those translators handy

   This basically sums up myself (hot man with six pack that volunteers his time with the handicapped)

    I don't care who you are, that's funny right there

      Our prison shower

Thus concludes the photo session of Testosterhome. I hope everyone made it through with their lunch still safely inside their stomachs. Can't say I didn't warn you though..Well I hope everyone has enjoyed this jam packed blog in all its splendor. I will try not to take too long to come out with another one.. I will leave you with this quote, "It's not gay if you don't like it." -Isaac Brooks. Peace out Nation.

P.S. Now it's time for the grand finale.. 8ohS!ck  ft. Jordan Allen covering 9 Crimes by Damien Rice. Enjoy

New Year, New Beginnings, New Opportunities, New Blessings

Hello again. Well it's official, I am back in the LBK. After 8 solid hours of cleaning and rearranging the Testosterhome (with no a/c on), it has finally become livable again. Some new features include: An actual living room, a bicycle workstation/storage space, and a wall of inspiration. We've got a new group of tenants at T-Home this year (Isaac, Stuart, Matt, Todd) as well as Daniel and myself. As I sit here beneath the wall of inspiration, feeling like I can write a novel, you may be wondering..why don't we turn on the a/c? Well here is the reasoning, 1) we basically live in a shed 2) being that we live in a shed, the insulation that we have isn't really Grade A stuff. But I digress, we are poor college students and in order to keep costs down, some sacrifices have to be made.

I am excited for this year. I think God has some pretty awesome things in store. Four day weekends won't be too shabby as well.. I shall be improving my culinary skills over the course of this year as so if you live in Lubbock and want some good cookin, you probably don't want to come over. That's all I have for now..I will leave you with this:

1) Song recommendation: Soco Amaretto Lime by Brand New
2) Movie recommendation: Law Abiding Citizen
3) We got internet today, so thank Suddenlink for your ability to read this literary masterpiece.
4) Sweating inside your own house is not the most appealing thing in the world..


Until we meet again. Peace

Why we live on "The Block"

Hello everyone,
If you are reading this, congratulations, you are now cooler than the person to both your left and your right. If there is no one to your left or right except for several cats, not even this amazing blog can make you cool..which brings me to my first thought of the day, I'm a realist. I am sorry if this offends you, but I will tell you how it is straight up. Respect.

Now on to the main topic. Why do I say that I live on "the block?" There are a couple reasons why this is so. First, there are three known drug dealers within fifty feet from my house. Not enough? How about the fact that we are right on the edge of what is considered the projects of Lubbock. Still not satisfied? This past summer, we have had two fatalities, one being a gruesome murder and the other being a freak drowning accident (R.I.P. Dave "Russell Brand"). Anyway, I love living in Testosterhome and would not live anywhere else if given the chance and the added danger brings a little more excitement to my life.

I have a several final thoughts:
1) The Atlanta Braves are still in first place in their division..boo ya
2) music recommendation: Dance or Die by Family Force Five
3) movie recommendation: Despicable Me
4) New Mexico still reigns atop my list of most evil places in the world followed by North Korea.

Until we meet again. God bless